so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
