she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Randomize