if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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