The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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