My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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