Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
