I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize