spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize