the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize