It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
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