So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
