I can feel you judging me through the phone.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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