im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize