Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Randomize
