3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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