It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
