Texts From Last Night

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  (217): View more from Illinois

  the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome

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  (217): the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome http://tfl.nu/yox5
  Replies (11) Good night (1628) Bad night (599)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?

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  (847): How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women? http://tfl.nu/e8g0
  Replies (92) Good night (1643) Bad night (4011)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Ridin mah bike see you on the moon

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  (636): Ridin mah bike see you on the moon http://tfl.nu/f5ya
  Replies (23) Good night (7286) Bad night (801)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.

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  (303): At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends. (1-303): At about the same time you guys weren't burritos. http://tfl.nu/mxci
  Replies (27) Good night (8125) Bad night (1046)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do

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  (201): the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do http://tfl.nu/8wsa
  Replies (24) Good night (1553) Bad night (4470)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..

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  (204): The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off.. http://tfl.nu/csfy
  Replies (5) Good night (4022) Bad night (1783)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor

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  (416): ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor http://tfl.nu/rb71
  Replies (5) Good night (2165) Bad night (1152)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.

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  (713): We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager. http://tfl.nu/qy4e
  Replies (11) Good night (2659) Bad night (960)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.

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  (503): There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to. http://tfl.nu/acu8
  Replies (7) Good night (2183) Bad night (1109)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.

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  (405): I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you. http://tfl.nu/on2x
  Replies (4) Good night (1435) Bad night (995)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus

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  (832): i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus http://tfl.nu/kvpc
  Replies (2) Good night (1698) Bad night (670)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.

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  (620): We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night. http://tfl.nu/jjc7
  Replies (8) Good night (1100) Bad night (646)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.

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  (814): Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME. http://tfl.nu/nij2
  Replies (6) Good night (1177) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.

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  (604): I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner. http://tfl.nu/27g8
  Replies (7) Good night (1360) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.

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  (810): I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face. http://tfl.nu/ll9t
  Replies (2) Good night (446) Bad night (341)

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