her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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