God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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