where does the pee come out of this thing
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Randomize
