Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
You are a genius and a whore.
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