My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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