Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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