There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.