My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize