I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
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he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
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just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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