hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
