Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
