i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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