i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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