Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
