what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
So apparently I’m into choking now
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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