You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize