Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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