God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.