around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
