My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
