We won't sleep together?
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
