dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
