she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize