Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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