you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
