They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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