I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
