If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
