Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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