pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize