I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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