I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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