Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
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make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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