I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
