girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize